Saturday Night Live
Let’s Go! SNL’s “Abby Phillip” on State of the Union recapped “President Biden’s” State of the Union speech. Whoo!
Mr. Speaker, too slow! That weirdo Speaker Mike Johnson!
“Biden” only refers to Trump as “my predecessor.” Cuz Mike Johnson shakes his head. Is it eery it sounds like, My, Precious! [For all you Lord of the Ring fans!]
Thank the “booing” MTG. Decked out in a red blazer, say her name T-shirt, and Make American Great Again red hat for, “dressing up tonight.” And also thank the Republican senator’s response to his speech. “I think she’s going to help me more than anything else I can say here.”
Jump to the response, err “This country is hell” monologue from “Scary Mom” Alabama Sen. Katie Britt.
“The craziest bitch in the Target parking lot” invites you into her “strange and empty kitchen.” Or the place where she “freaked out the entire country” to appeal to women voters.
The “not performing” Britt tells a dramatic tale. Sex trafficking where nothing is real. While hawking be-jeweled cross necklaces you can wear from “da church” to “da club.” No, Thank You! She then freaks out Kenan Thompson stirring a cup of tea. Get Out!
Looking in your frig! It seems there are migrants on the top shelf of your frig! Threatening President Biden that she will be there when he closes his eyes.
Thank You, Scarlet Johannsen!
Weekend Update
Colin Jost declared: Sleepy Joe finally woke the hell up! Jost called out Donald Trump, former president, and current reverse mortgage applicant. He criticized Biden's speech but spoke with his “effortless grace.” Cue Video! Trump flubbing his words at a campaign rally. “Sounding like someone just inserted a colonoscopy camera.”
Jost called Alabama Katie Britt’s “worst acting” rebuttal to the State of the Union, A Britt Much. Asking, “Is she OK?” No, we don’t think she is. And no number of acting classes will help whatever that was.
Then there’s Marjorie Taylor Greene at the SOTU. Jost’s “dressed for her shift at TGI Crazies.” Only to be zapped by a “Jewish Space Laser” after telling a reporter to F*ck Off! KHARMA BABY!
IMAGES
Joe Biden Caricature | License—CC BY 2.0
Laser Picture | License—CC BY 4.0
MAGA Hat | License—CC BY SA 4.0
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